Anxious Desire

Hunger burns a fierce image within my mind.
The thought of her, my beauty, festers and seeps and wounds.
Passion builds when man awakes, when I lie in darkness, waiting for the morning sun.
Obsession plagues!
Once seen, my thoughts of her affect.
I cannot eat…or breathe…or focus still.
Headaches form with lack of her.
I cannot see.
I close my eyes & numbness prevails.
She stands there, flowing dress & perfect hair.
I yearn.
Sickness rises. Imagination grasps, asks for her.
This fool deludes, minds eye plays, my throat is dry.
Tightening.
Will I see her? Will I meet her? Will I say her name or run?
Will she smile? Will she talk? Will she even come my way?
A clever man so stupid born.
Abiding desire works its way on in.
I can not focus. I cannot think.
I cannot put my name to pen & scribe an essay full of words which smile for her.
& I struggle to write these words you read.
I breathe but only crazed imagination fueled.
Who’s in control?
I long. I yearn. I ache & dream & watch the lonely ticking hand drift on by.
So slow.
Dreaming thoughts meander past.
A soft slow river of helpless needs.
Fire inside alight & bright,
Imagination burns completely without control.
Already hands are held & smiles amuse
All within the mind of fool.

~ I wish that fate would change!

© Ed Simkins

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