Without Her.

A day off without her.
No laughter.
No beauty.
No brilliance.
It’s killing me.

Why can’t I see her every day?
Hold her & play with her and just be with her.

Why is it that love pains so much?

I hold the photo I have of her & I miss her!
Boy do I miss her!

It doesn’t laugh or chat or talk or tease or flirt or dance or play or whirl or hold.
She’s beautiful in it, but it’s not all that she is.
Not by far.

& I’m missing her!

Behind this smile I long for her.
I long to tell her how much I want her here.

I cannot cope with death. & I cannot cope with this.
I need her.

Time is cruel. Love is worse.
Fate & Life conspire against every wish I ever have.

I love her.

Please tell her.

xXx

– A long day without her.
© ed simkins 2016

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Saturday Night.

I need a hobby.
A Saturday night adventure.
I need to escape.
I need to fall in love.
Or fly to the moon.
For this evening is the worst.
A long day of regression.
Of tears & of dreams.
Hiding below the water
Hidden behind the door.
The torture repeats
& The music engulfs
& this fool of the living
He sits broken on the floor.
The world it has ended
& the ghosts are alive.
Pictures remind me
& the memories stream through
The week is so busy
& the soul always tired
But this night of god Saturn
He tears me & he rips me
& I’m lost out at sea
Buffeted by the waves
& conquered by loss
I regret each moment I’m alive
Til the excitement kicks in
But here on a Saturday
I wait at death’s door
& I look out the window
& I belt out my name.
But the world remains silent
& this life just drags on
You see I need an adventure
You see I just need…
SOMETHING.

~ as it is. I’m bored beyond measure! Life wasting away. Listening to ‘Jessie Ware’

© ed simkins