The Angel Of My Heart

In the distance we met, eyes seeking our friend.
Roaming the fields, ‘til we met at the end.
Love was a smile, a face of recognition.
Wanting her closely, she knows she’s my mission.
Frustration & insanity fly far away
When the angel of my heart races my way.
She smiles & I soar, arms wide as the sky
Dying for my soul mate, tears could I cry.
She approaches & she grins & I bid her good day
For words are the cover to the thoughts that I pray
Smiles are exchanged & my heat it beats faster
She is my beauty, & I am her master
Fingers entwine, and the playing ensues
Stroking her silk hair, I ask her for news
Banter is kissed and sent from her lips
As my hands hold gently the arc of her hips
Bringing her forth and a soft sigh ejects
Tickling her slowly so no-one suspects
Holding her tightly I bring her so close
Telling her I love her & I’ve missed her the most.
She looks with a smile & she flicks off her hair
& I caress her so calmly, I show that I care
We talk & we play & we stand there a while
God & his princess, for a moment on trial
My nerves are electric, her fingers are cold
She turns and she presses, so cheekily bold
She arouses with glee & she hardens desire
Raging beside her, my fantasy on fire.
She giggles once more & she stands on my feet
I am surrounded & broken, this army is beat
Moments of ecstasy shoot through my mind
As this princess before plays with my mind.
She bids to be with me & she calls out my name
& runs off & waves, & I’m crying insane.

– I am so in love, so besotted with her. Why does love always hurt?
© ed simkins 2016

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If’s and when’s and maybe’s & all the words that fuck me up.

I sit here dreaming in the furniture of my youth.
Happy dreams that established me.
Playing out in the warm wide sun.
Soldiers trekking through the garden known.
I’m older now but wish I could
Open the door and return back there.
Those happy days without end or sight
Of deadlines which haunt me now and bind my mind.

I see myself as once I was
Smile alight on a tender face
Knowing none of the bullshit which haunts me now.
Running amok with innocent imagination on fire
And the rockery a battlefield of happy toys.
I’d climb on windows and escape the mess
Of Lego strewn on bloodied floor
Walls of Hadrian crossed the room
And days were spent in battles grown.

Then came desktops and cassette radios all climbed by men in suits
Uniforms of war and guns of fun
Stretched high and thrust upon the shelves of books.
I’d spend my days in conquest or happy defeat
Knowing that tomorrow I would do the same.
No need for doubt, no need for pain,
No need to care what mankind did or died outside.

Freedom is the word which recalls my youth
Playing football in the local park or street
Climbing trees and laughing loud, reading books and making plans
I’m older now, but I escape to then, I return to the past to find myself.
He who’s lost in this frightening grown up world
One of death and hate & fear and sin
Not like the world in which I began.

A child stays fresh, his mind alive
Fighting dragons and playing games, being cops and stealing space
All these things & more I held so dear.
The if’s and buts and when’s or maybe’s
They were never words when I was young.
I owned the world & I was king
I was someone special, alive, unique
I was as big as my ego wished itself to be.
Could life ever be like that again?

~ aka: A Lament For The Old Days
*one song, one programme, was all it needed to send me into a spin today.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FKd2G9CYKmE
http://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/b05r7nxx/onehit-wonders-at-the-bbc

© ed simkins