Unknown Recluse

I am lonely but for the candle which burns before me.

My eyes tortured by the sight I drank of her this day.

Sweet & young & faithful,

Crimson flirt & thoughtful words.

 

I am sick for needing her.

For urging fate to somehow twist & bring her forth to my world of darkness this long & lonely night.

 

I am empty.

Numb.

Alone.

 

Her golden smile shatters worlds of desperate pain & feeds the world with love & joy & abandoned giddy smiles.

My angel!

My perfect, pretty smiling friend!

 

I am dying for the love of you!

That I could hold & dance & swirl with you!

That I could seek your lips upon these forgotten keepers of my words.

These gates which do imprison me.

 

I love you…

There! I nearly said your name!

& the world would know!

 

But I love you & my hands will hold you secret love,

Tomorrow in the kindness of the day.

& words will I stutter & speak & jestfully declare

That no girl makes the world so fair.

 

Or breaks my heart through longing for you!

 

For you!

 

& tears shed in wanton, frustrated fashion from these tired eyes.

 

I love you…

& I scream your name in calling you!

In wanting you!

In loving you!

 

– anguish.

© ed simkins 2016

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Quiet.

A stillness born of death pervades my room.
I’m sat here.
Silent.

I’m tired.
Weary.
Mind screaming war-worn tales of

Confusion.

Thoughts which dangle around the cord around my neck.
To pull or jump.
To hide or fall.

Shadows mock the sights portrayed.
Notions of success & lover’s loved.
That I was king but now a tramp.

I breathe & mind stumbles towards an exit known.
In death can dreams become a golden shrine.
& the earth will give me gentle rest.

I seek escape.

~ a late night film & broken thoughts
© ed simkins 2015