17:42

Trapped.
Bored.
Her face, her voice, her fine young body lodged firmly within my mind.
I’m plagued by want.

Now what?
What can I do to alleviate this pain?
All I do is mope & long & want & dream
& hunger fills my thoughts with such strong desire.

Yet there’s nothing I can do.

Time without her kills.
It burns.
It cuts.
It hurts.

She drifts away on a daily tide & each weekend she sails the world by ocean light
& here I wait…
An empty vessel
My harbour quiet
Still
Lifeless.

I ache with excitement when she’s around
& I smile & gallop & climb a thousand trees for fun.
& then she’s gone.
& I’m left to rot.
A futile jester all alone.

I love her my friends.
I love her more than I can ever know myself.

& I’m scared.

I’m scared by death & the end which comes.
I’m scared by the daily goodbye.
I’m scared by the moments I know in which she’s not there.
& I’m scared that I own no control.

I have never felt so in love my friends
So excited & joyful & happy & free
& torn by doubt & pain & want
What can I do my friends?

But die in love & loneliness.

– Life is cruel in its complexity.
© ed simkins

Advertisements

On her Return

Perfection smiles.
She’s back.
Her hair cascades in lines of desire down across her tender skin.

She’s seen me dreaming.
She knows I’m there. Waiting.
I’m nonchalant in stance.
My heart is pounding.

She walks over.
Makes me wait an eternal age as she takes control.
I love the tease.
I know I’ll win this game.

How are you? I ask. My words aligned with love & kisses.
I place them on her smooth sweet skin.
My eyes gliding, flirting with every pore on her face.

We walk.
A simple, slow aimless path.
& She sits.
& my hands talk to her body in rhymes of want.

The world is right again.
& She’s here with me, though the moment’s still short.
We smile. & play & the world is right.

I cup her cheek. Her face so close & sweet.
I tilt my head.
& slow dreams creep, tiptoe in.

& the perfect one is kissed.

– How I succumbed to my fate!
© ed simkins 2016

Sleep Request

blankets of illusion climb upon my face
I’m lost to the destiny of today.
Dreams percolate thoughts of fatigue
If I could escape I’d try.

Soft hand request
A distant want through pain.
I’m ill & sick & the walkers pass
Hurling obscenities on the streets below.

A simple note I leave upon my door
‘find me – but only if you wish to witness death’
& I writhe below the terror of my escapade.
Sleep is a closing friend.

Searing levels of frustration & nightmarish angst cross my brow.
I care little now for your response or avid need.
Stumble up the stairs well known
& drift through books of the fallen dead.

Eyes burning, yearning, tears fill these poisoned voids.
I look no more in your direction nor call.
Flowers pray in coloured smiles
Forest angel claims no more.

Girl stands upon my feet & stares,
Asks my name in perfect solitude, no voice.
I kiss her sweetly, caress her cheek
& vomit forth the deed of sleep.