Retreat

Time
Eroding life
With pulsing beats of death.
Brain rotting
Failing
Dying.

A whole day of wonder
Distinguished by emptiness.
& I sleep by the graves alone.

Tonight will be painful.
I must gallop to the junction of the past & my dreams.
& I know I will I fail
I’m struggling now.

Hero of want
With the darkest of minds.
A mind which sinks from a single sharp thought.
A balloon deflated, pricked by reality.

A man who has everything
Gathers & sits.
Worn out by thinking.
Drugged by illusion.
Bled dry by fate.

But soon I will venture
For another mad escape.
I will run to the shops & buy thoughts for the dead.
Fool by a grave stone
Honestly tortured
Feeling sick with the worry
That one day I’ll wake up
& notice life passed.

Herein an example;
A day of no purpose
Lost deep within here
Mind stuck, no solution.
Mid afternoon & time to relapse
Bed calling for sorrow, a book & collapse.

Escape from the pain
The anger, frustration.
In bed I will dream
A hero untamed.
But there I am conquered
Withdrawn from the light.
& shallow thoughts burden.
I’m tired of the fight.

~ a single moment & the lights are switched off inside & the eagerness is gone.
© ed simkins

Saturday Night.

I need a hobby.
A Saturday night adventure.
I need to escape.
I need to fall in love.
Or fly to the moon.
For this evening is the worst.
A long day of regression.
Of tears & of dreams.
Hiding below the water
Hidden behind the door.
The torture repeats
& The music engulfs
& this fool of the living
He sits broken on the floor.
The world it has ended
& the ghosts are alive.
Pictures remind me
& the memories stream through
The week is so busy
& the soul always tired
But this night of god Saturn
He tears me & he rips me
& I’m lost out at sea
Buffeted by the waves
& conquered by loss
I regret each moment I’m alive
Til the excitement kicks in
But here on a Saturday
I wait at death’s door
& I look out the window
& I belt out my name.
But the world remains silent
& this life just drags on
You see I need an adventure
You see I just need…
SOMETHING.

~ as it is. I’m bored beyond measure! Life wasting away. Listening to ‘Jessie Ware’

© ed simkins

A Request to You.

Hey! I want to ask you something!
A connection made through time.
Though words of deepness made this evening
Elude me through this rhyme.
I wish that we, both you & I,
Could sit and speak & talk,
Or meet one day on earth’s fair land
& converse upon a walk.
My Questions collate & my knowledge seeks
A fertile train of thought
So I approach you friend, in human peace
For a friend is what is sought.
I’m 59 & 23
& all the age between
With kingdoms made & battles won
Romance is but a dream
If naked ladies ruled my world
Or beauty cast its vote
Then soul of mine, in hidden world,
Would ride outside and gloat!
But broken thoughts & failed remorse
Are curses sent to me
Which entrap & bind & tear deep wounds
– Relate no sympathy.
But here I ask & answers please!
I seek your fertile mind!
Suggest a life best led my friends
Of one that I may find.
You think I’m nuts but here I write
As evening sun departs
as pleasing forms of love & youth
Relinquish from my heart.
I wish, I hope, nay I do plead
That beauty could find it’s way
& embellish in sweet perfume & scent
An angel for this day.
But more than this I seek new worlds,
Adventure is my key!
So tell me friends, my dear read,
What direction must I be?
Give hope I ask, or bright advice,
Send ideas o’wonderment,
I need your clever thoughts, your dreams
I need them heaven sent.
with last repose, my last request
– Seriously I ask of thee!
What new adventure could I take
My friends, suggest to me!

~ yes, an actual real life request from me to YOU READER for ideas for a new adventure! I hope you’ll send a few! PLEASE!
© Ed Simkins