Escape?

Broken knives hover like eagles in the sky.
Bloodied wrist torn & sore.
Eyes drenched in pain
Heart sunk in anger.

I hear the call & stolen lies
Jestful tweaks of hate
Bloody minded you say
You know nothing of the volcano inside.

Frustration mounts in steps so huge
A sickness builds & throat fills up
Disdain for life, disdain for hope
Only solitude pacifies the mind.

A world of loathsome fear stares back at me
Hate & terror & those who kill
I’m tortured here by the control of others
Those of little wit & shallow lives

The blade dangles release within my grasp
If only eyes could focus on this shameful end
Then weakness of the heart & mind
Would in cave find sweet relief

Narrow cut & drowning bath
Water filled with crimson tears
Who’d care if human died
& man escaped by choice?

Oh bloody minded you repeat
With bullshit lines of ineptitude & understanding
Aggression held below the fakest manner
& poisoned spit withheld in cheek

Power told & chained neck brought back
Who I am to run off free?
That knife still circulates
Too weak to bring it sudden down.

~ horrendous bullshit & lack of power.
© ed simkins

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Eyes Upon You

That I could strip you down
A simple thought of evil deed
Your naked body standing there
I’d inspect with eyes that ration kills
I’d breathe you in & take my time
I care little for the ways of love
A mischievous glimmer that shines upon
I fancy making wait your call
Let insecurity take hold
For when you stand there, naked firm,
Your arms and hands would cover you
& such sweet tender masks that hide
Your face would fall like leaves
Such mangled lies no more disguise
Power soaked and hungry lust
Abiding time would grow in loins
For girl, this child of blossomed youth,
With golden locks which flow through grip,
& Nervous smile of fearful trust
My hands would slowly reach & touch
Your frame of soft, still, tearful love
Interest held and raging tiger paused
I’d rip through time like knives through silk
& dance across your valleys smooth
With loving tongue, a kiss and fire
And squeamish, squirmish fragile skin
Would rage in fresh delights & yearn
I can hardly bide my time or stay
For girl whose spirit yet stands before,
Your slim white body, my beacon born,
I ache for you to slowly strip!
Say no word but smile & see consume
A man behind these secret walls
A man who gazes soft upon
Your charms of such sweet and luscious fun,
If you were here my darling girl
If only you were here…!

~ gazing upon an unspeaking dream, my eyes danced in joy around a strangers frame
© Ed simkins

Confusion Illusion

Encamped within the blankets of the midnight sun

I am lost, & scared; confused indeed.

I know little of truth, if truth exists

I speak & the stories I tell are false

Love or hate, desire or power, I cannot ascertain their strength nor value & virtue, legality or even sense?

I speak my mind; delusions play.

A fatal flaw, a door, an entrance to another world I seek.

I stare at life & conquer fear & a lie

I tell you things, I draw these things,

But the fear of the heart persists

& I question you.

Bewitched by lust, controlled by want

My mind facilitates the loan of thought

A fabric made of fables known to women of a certain age

& all who lie

– The human race

Mindless, naked bodies in feminine & incredible disguise, I seek your bliss!

& riches made in notes which burn.

My wallet holds secrets bound

Credit cards unused & lewd ownership of cars.

& the biggest lie?

That I exist

& in this told I find myself chained & fixed & worse controlled

By banks & dreams & Hollywood,

Of governments & gestures shook.

Nor Friends & family I say exist

& sex or intellect, none do persist

& so I dream of sleep & waste my time

& watch the sun arise, as tomorrow flies.

A sad reprise but wonder works.

I ask you – how much freedom do we have?

~ The power of the unknown scares the hell of me.

© ed Simkins

nine minutes alone

one last attempt & i shake my head.

my hand transfixed by the beauty of her neck.

it would not move.

her neck was warm, her lips moist and red and brightly shone.

i wished to kiss.

the pause before i escape will be long for i cannot get past her beauty.

But shall I kill or let her sleep?

*I love her*

but then I’ve written that on her walls.

Yet beats of blood splash through her veins. a tear upon her eye.

She sleeps but i guess she knows. She has been here many times before.

i long for her. but i cannot. I must not.

A brightly lit room.

but key in downstairs hall makes me scared. SHE is home & a dream must die.

Or i.

…Or i.

her flaxen hair swirls across the pillows white and her naked body escapes under crumpled clothes.

do you suppose that death should take the virgin fire and encapsulate it in my memory?

With walls of red and a loin that hurts, i know this girl will sleep and gently talk.

for i am God and god does well.

He covets and spies and seeks his pleasure, but yet, see him leave!

& know that angel rests in weary sleep, with weary dreams and weary thoughts.

i leave a kiss. planted on her soft pristine forehead. & I must run.

I must act unwell. I must act the role! the one that says that I am ghost.

& i let her sleep.

& i know that you cannot speak.

(c) Ed Simkins

~ I have no idea! I closed my eyes & this is what I saw!