Consumed

God cares no more for the tears of a foolish man.

One who loves & wants & seeks & knows the child, the girl, the angel of his heart who lies before him in naked pose…

 

But dies.

 

For God, if man believed in such, knows nothing but how to hurt & cut & tear & destroy crippled man’s world.

He knows how to paint the dreams I have so black.

 

…Black!

 

This tortured epiphany of death, the cloud of time which takes all & leaves uncharted & unknown

Leaves me silent.

With hate for the dreams & hopes & eternal longing of broken men.

As such I am.

 

I kneel beside this naked corpse of my lover’s fine & youthful virgin land.

Beauty wrapped in golden silk & luscious white skin of tender age.

I love her.

Oh how I love her!

In death as in life I love her & no more will lips of joy be warm to touch

Or soft  nestling of her childlike chin breath happiness into finger tips which seek for her.

 

Hence I close my eyes.

& Tears dawdle upon my angered face.

Collective streams of memories flood my mind

& I hold her hand.

Cold & still.

 

Pain engulfed by pain rides through these veins of want.

 

I see no point

No purpose

No future morning sun without her.

 

I take the cut slowly.

 

Fingers of red rivers roll across my wrist.

 

Life subsides into forgotten dreams.

I lie beside her & cry.

I hold onto her.

 

Silence fills the world with stillness

& the leaves on autumn trees outside fall & wave goodbye.

 

 

© ed simkins

– life without her?

Without You (Once More)

& Jennifer or the girl in short skirt legged stance of dreams,
She who stands before in dreams of naked youth
I miss you.

I long to seduce, I want to seduce
I want to lead your hand to kingdoms new & play & sing alone with you
In darling scenes of joy & love & midnight mass.

I’m terrorised by these thoughts that you could hate
That you could fear
That you could stare at me & see no truth within these eyes which shine for you.

I love you.
& my sickness, illness of a fearful dread pours forth
& cries in unashamed & woeful screams & dies.

Where are you?

I caused my own loss tonight.
An evening lost without your smiles which shine
Your eyes which speak of happy thoughts…& dream.

I missed you.
& when I saw you curl your hair around your charming ear did I find the breath to sigh & dream
& wonders staged my fallen grace. & here I think alone of you.

I gaze at you.
Your naked breast invites such longing that no man knows of no warmer sight
& That no man knows a curve so sharp or kills.

& I follow you.
A broken puppy which begs pathetically for dribbles of your love
For moments of sweet seduction in your attention; I long for you.

& darkness falls.

For all success & riches made in days like this for futures yet
Are but delicious sweets found laced with death & poison
If my days lived exist without the beauty of your gracious face

& dreams persist of you.
Dreams in which you clamber forth my bedroom steps & gently lay
& sweetly smile beside in naked bliss & heavens kiss.

I want you.

~ being without even the sight of you.
© ed simkins

Fifty pounds to dream!

You are supreme!
A perfect dream who talks to me!
My sweet Lolita, my dearest child, my drunken dream & fantasy!
You drive me wild!
& little do you know!!!!
How many times can I scream and yell your name & declare my eternal affection?! – Nay, love!

You drive me insane my girl!

I see you there with such, such, sweet hesitancy
& how you walk!
& How you smile with nervous delights & tease me with electric pleasure!
I cannot cope! I cannot love no more than this!
& here I am – purging volcanic words of love and need upon the world
& all because I cannot tell you my sweet!
Oh poor me!
Poor, poor me!!!

You’re in my mind!
Again & again have I captured you there.
Your bosom prying for my attention as your lips speak in seductive honesty.
You cannot see me. Nor the rampage of thoughts that drill through my mind.
I’m yearning & aching & going out of my mind with how much I seek you!
& then you declare, with rye abandonment, that purchase can be made
& I tease!
Oh, how I tease!
& another dream begins!!!

Pay the cash – pay the cash!!! For would I wish to spend a night with you alone?
Oh god, if one were true, would I thrust a wallet full of gold within your hands
& upon my knee would I beg, plead, implore you to stay with me!
& thence within the warmth of my heart would I seduce & undress your fatal charms!
& kiss with such tender lips those which talk
& upon your freckles would I gaze and gentle fingers slowly caress
Across your clothes which would fall upon the virgin floor
& oh, oh dreams would complete the rest of naked wish!

Your ebullience & radiance & awkward hesitancy seduce me!!
I am so, so in love with you!
& here, far from the awkwardness of your presence, I shout to the world!
– I love you!
I love you! I love you! I love you! I love you!
& you are perfect beyond any imagination!!!
So please my god, allow this kiss to reach & press her sacred lips
& tell her that I would do anything, anything, to hold her here,
so close to me tonight.

~ to the most beautiful girl I know; she who seduces me without knowing!
© ed simkins

In Love with a friend (a letter to Her).

I need now to stop you. I need your attention.
I have the ears of the world but it’s yours that I seek.
I have something to say & it burns me right through.
I love you.
Seriously. I love you.
I love you. I love you. I love you.  & it’s killing me so!

From the moment you walked in when your smile lit my heart
I cried & I knew, My face danced in joy!
These are the things that you set upon me
& I want to tell you but I know that I can’t.
So here to the world, & I scream through my heart…I love you.
…I love you!

You dolled up your face & you shook up my heart, a sexed up Lolita with a razor sharp tongue.
You laughed & you smiled & my knees they were weak, but I kept it together & I set your life free.
You came & we spoke & I sang with my passion, you held on my arm & we danced & we spun,
We giggled & we chatted & we conquered the night, & the success that you brought I owe in such honour.
So I love you my girl. I love you so much!

Your lipstick of scarlet seduced my young heart, as your hair in a plait softened my fear
Your perfect pink cheeks, alive like a fire, sparkling with warmth & the radiance naïve
& your Cleopatra eyes, which entrance, pull me in, I can’t tell you the secrets that stand behind mine,
These smiles you induce & the passion inside. Your clothes left unripped & your smile not yet kissed
You tell me of others & I stand there a friend, but I’m your slave don’t you see, & I’ve fallen for you!
& I’d scream your sweet name if only to attract, & I’d hold you beside for a second too long
For your dreams I desire, you love is my goal, but friendship averts such knowledge of these thoughts
& these smiles that you share or your eyes when we meet, In golden moments alone when the rest they don’t think
& In these seclusions I undress you, in these seconds that we kiss,
& in our asides i pretend that your flirting or more, I pretend you’re seducing & I’m begging, encore
Cause I need you, I want you & I’m screaming out loud, I love you desire, Its love that I’ve found.

The moments we share are bliss for my heart, you’re the drug that I’d kill for, The fuel for these words
When will you see that you’re the goddess I request, the girl of my dreams, I love you the best,
I love you my friend & I wish that you knew. I wish that you’re beauty could stay in my life
& smile for me more & never will regret, These moments together, & these days that we get.

Girl…
I love you. With all of your beauty, I love you.

~ written for the sweetest, prettiest, most fun, most desirable girl that I know. I adore you so, so much & so completely. I’m a fool but I love.
© ed simkins

Travel Fights The Burning Heart

If love were real then dreams would flow,
And silent tears alone would know,
That smoke & hate are haggard’s thoughts,
From rounded women that money bought.
I’d turn to see my golden child,
My pretty girl with pretty smile.
Imagination keeps her there,
In pleasant place where all men stare.
Adventure calls to far off lands,
With dainty girls & youthful hands,
Orange sun & crazy laughs,
Midnight feasts & camping drafts,
I’ll freeze to death in roadside grass,
Unknown to secret lovers past.
I dream of one who love admires,
The girl who lights my yearning fire,
& there she is; naked, toned,
Fantasies, orgasmic moans,
Whose playful whim, which sparkles so,
& teasing actions that makes things grow.
But plane arrives in Amsterdam,
This girl I leave, her biggest fan,
For if I believed in marriage told,
I’d live with her til I was old,
We’d travel much & love much more,
We’d see the Alps & Pacific shore,
Each bridge we’d cross, I’d stop her still,
& kiss her lips & smile in thrill.
Travel becomes a girl so young,
Like music set to sensual song,
We’d sway in June & sleep in May,
Caress her body each gentle day,
Her warmth in soul it radiates,
& fills my heart with love that aches.
& as I plan & flight will take,
Alone I leave, though not forsake,
That precious dream who resides in me,
How I’d travel with her if love could be.
For call me mad, or call me fool,
God lets me dream, though he is cruel,
I wish to love that naked spark,
& leave this love within her heart.
So let me settle with maiden dear,
& I‘d travel not with distant fear.

~ Happy Travel coming, but I dream so much of HER.
© Ed Simkins

short poem on the way out

nerves are jangling, the time runs by,

her pretty face, no tears to cry

i hide in cars and travel fast

a moment of passion which shoots on past

a quick smile or two and hidden dreams

a clear concious, or so it seems

petrol bought and shirt and tie

worn and ironed, it’s time to fly.

i’d love to speak but princess calls,

watch me later, see me fall.

a nervous smile is all i’ve got

ridicule will be my lot,

but get it right and night will say

that Valentine will get to play.

~ stolen laughter, or maybe nerves

(c) Ed Simkins

i just need & want to say your name

a beauty queen that teases me, her belt inducing, seducing me,

she’s standing there and looking fine, i’m dying to kiss and make her mine

her smile perfection, my temple of peace, this is where my search does cease

she sways a rhythm and her hips do tease, if god existed, i’d aim to please

i’d undress that girl and stand her tall, and worship her from head to floor

she’s killing me with naked looks, her fine young body and all those nooks

she stands so close & i taste her breath, sweet attraction and her skin so fresh

my teeth to bite & hands to claw,  i lay her down on furnished floor

to caress her curves like waves on shore, with her my love i’m needing more

she smiles, we kiss, and heavens rain, with gratitude for the end of pain

we lie like that for the end of time, and i’m grinning baby, cause now you’re mine

oh dreams that come and nights that go, we bask in silence, and we feel the flow

the ecstasy sustains, then drives us on, until the basking of the morning sun

romeo and juliet in naked clothes, her body warm in silken rose

my hands enclose and love once more, cause my heart is fixed, no longer torn.

if only i could say my dreams, then i would call & say believe!

i just need & want to say your name, i adore so much, i’m quite insane!

~ a beautiful dream about a beautiful girl 🙂

(c) ed simkins

Secret Eyes

I love the fact that your turn your head to see me.

Each time you smile, & without acknowledgement to the crowd around us, i die a happy death!

I can never decide if I should come across & kiss you. to show you how i feel. to make that mistake.

I know that I’m not allowed. but how easily i could & i would & …oh! 🙂

It’s a simple truth that your beauty radiates through the cold, still room. & no-one notices.

No-one But i.

& How, how I love our secret! How I love to whisper discreet impositions into your angelic, delicate little ear.  How i’d love to stroke your hair, uncurl it and tease you & hold you. & more.

But it’s a secret I hold to. I must.

& I’ll gladly watch you. I’ll kiss your smile each time you look at me.

Each time you wink. Each time you motion a soft phrase of delight and send it my way.

One day you’ll say ‘please’ & then a king, your king, will i be.

Oh how those tender eyes tell me that story & how i dream upon your gaze!

How I dream!

(c) Ed Simkins

There is Another Side to Me…

head bobbing, music blaring, night time freezing, body warming

blonde girl seeing, my eyes staring, RED hat wearing, smile a-shining

food fighting, table merry, Christmas coming, Santa busy

princess kissing, mind a-dreaming, friends are teasing, my hope’s wasting

legs are shaking, throat is croaking, bright is the moon sky, night time dreaming

her body tender, face erupting, nerves are biting, lips are pure

moments soft, solitary bliss, i aim to reach her, but narrowly miss

friends escaping, madness drinking, laughter chorus, dating passed

a classic night with lots of fun, that blonde girl dated, i’m a happy one.